I was 13 days past my due date.  I’d expected this babe to show up no later than 9 days past, as my first had, but she had other plans!  We didn’t have a single ultrasound the entire pregnancy – this was a decision my husband and I reached together after much thought and consideration.  There are many reasons people have ultrasounds, but we decided that our course of action would not change based on any information an ultrasound could give us. I continued to decline them as my due date came and went.  I had the most supportive team of midwives - absolutely amazing.  They were great about making sure I was educated throughout the pregnancy and 100% supportive of my choices when I made them.  This support continued as I went past my due date.  They ensured I was aware of the risks associated with post-dates babies, how that might impact my planned home birth, and also honoured the fact that my body simply seemed to want to gestate this baby for a bit longer than 40 wks!  They were fully supportive of my choice to attend the NST (non-stress test) but skip the AFI (amniotic fluid index) ultrasound.

Neighbours, friends and family were getting a bit anxious.  My doula and mother in law (she was to watch the kids during the birth if needed) had both left town (we never expected I would go past their dates of departure 10 and 13 days after my due date).  I started to think I’d remain pregnant forever.  I was surprisingly comfortable, and when I sat with myself I felt in my heart that this baby was just choosing its own time, but there were moments when I felt overwhelmed and nervous.  We’d pulled the kids out of daycare June 1st thinking I’d have the baby some time in early May and have some time to adjust…but the end of May was coming fast!

We busied ourselves with all kinds of projects in those final weeks – we repainted our entire main floor (ceiling, and baseboards included!), we found someone to take over the lease for my car, and found another to purchase, I cooked and baked to fill our deep freeze with easy meals, and we went out and bought a new king sized bed!

I was running out of projects to do, I was up a lot in the night (this is common due to hormonal changes) and started to feel that if I wasn’t sleeping much anyway – I might as well have this baby in my arms!  My hubby was so supportive as I went through my ups and downs – he just kept reassuring me “everything is fine, baby is happy, there’s no rush”.  It was just what I needed to hear!  My blood pressure was normal, the baby was active – there was no need for concern, and I remained patient.  I spend so much time supporting moms to listen to and trust their bodies, and I have a strong and genuine faith in letting nature take its course.  If there had been additional concerns of hypertension, or any other risk factors I would have taken these into consideration – but thankfully the only thing “unusual” about my situation was simply that I was beyond 41+3 the time that many health care providers will recommend induction.

I had several people ask me “how far will they let you go?”, “so when are you getting induced?”  I took the opportunity to educate people about the fact that we have a CHOICE in the matter.  Many people hear their health care provider say “well, at 41+3 , it’s time to get your baby out” and take it as it’s said – this is what’s happening.  The truth is, anyone can say “I’d prefer to wait, I’d prefer to see when my body chooses to go into labour” .  Anyone can ask “is it medically necessary? why is there an urgency to get the baby out?”.  I encourage people to do the research and make their OWN decision as to what is best for them and their baby.  With my first baby I was told I would be induced due to low amniotic fluid – it was treated as though it were an urgent matter – that is, until there were more urgent cases and I was lucky enough to be left alone for 5 days after this assessment.  My body went into labour on its own, and I couldn’t help but wonder what would have been different had there not been several more urgent cases ahead of me – if the hospital had been slow I’d certainly have been induced.  I was glad for this opportunity to learn, and it was part of my reason for making the personal choice to decline an Amniotic Fluid Index with my second baby.

For several weeks my baby had been posterior.  I had done everything possible to encourage my baby to turn anterior.  I had birthed my first baby posterior, so I took this extra time to make peace with the fact that I may just have a body type more suited to posterior babies, and to mentally prepare myself for the possibility of another lengthy labour.  Posterior babies often take longer to descend, and often the cervix will not dilate quite as quickly as an anterior labour.  I tickled my baby’s hands and feet as they waved around the front of my belly.  I wondered whether we’d be welcoming a boy or girl, and how and when this baby would decide to emerge.

As members of our support team left, as the spaces at the boys’ daycare filled, and as I added an extra stripe or two to my belly – I connected with my baby and my husband, and enjoyed the last days as a family of 4.  Our baby danced in my belly and my trust in my body deepened.

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